???? Book information - Title: I like you who speak nicely - Author: Beomjun Kim - Publisher: Forest Books ???? Time stamp 00:16 Opening ment 03:51 Conversation is the realm of wisdom 10:32 A word that turns your heart around 18:14 The temperature of conversation 27:38 Prologue 38:31 Closing ment * * * ???? Book introduction “Words become seeds, and the fruits of life grow from those seeds!” Bestselling author Beomjun Kim’s masterpiece of relationship reflections on conversation methods with 300,000 copies A conversation method expert who changed the lives of 300,000 readers, author Beomjun Kim, suggests a way to change relationships and change the flow of life with a single word. Everyone wants to communicate and empathize with the other person through conversation, but in reality, there are many cases where the results are different from what they expected. It is common to want to feel 'fun' and 'good to be together' rather than 'uncomfortable', 'scared', or 'honestly, comfortable alone' through conversation, but there are many cases where a long-built relationship is destroyed or reaches a state where it can no longer be approached with a single slip of the tongue. How can we approach the person we want to talk to as much as we want? Can we straighten up a broken relationship? Can we maintain an appropriate distance in a relationship? The author says that the solution is 'pretty words'. This book contains methods for finding and utilizing 'pretty words' that are most appropriate for the situation. ???? One-line conversations in the book make mistakes when trying to get something from the other person. You can reduce mistakes when you start by knowing what kind of person the other person is. So now, before having a conversation, think about 'who on earth is this person' first. Focus on being interested in what kind of person the other person is, but stop focusing only on communication where you pour out what you have to get something from the other person. Listen carefully. And be interested. If possible, it would be better to go beyond interest and reach the level of observation. What does it mean to 'know communication'? It doesn't mean that you know a lot of communication techniques. In order to communicate well, you have to start by clearly asking yourself, 'What do I know about the other person in the conversation?' That way, you can approach them and someday face them warmly. --- From "Words that Distantly, Words that Approach" People become human only when they can communicate with themselves. You have to realize who you are and what you do, and trust it, and the subject should be yourself, not someone else. This is why you have to get used to cheering for yourself and rewarding yourself. When you can say to yourself, "I'm a really good person. Everything will be fine," you will gain the strength to take a step closer to the world. But what do we look like? Aren't we repeating words like "I'm going crazy," "I hate you," and "I'm sick of it?" They say that if you repeat anything ten thousand times, it will actually happen like a spell. Why are you saying irreversible bad things about yourself? And that's not all. There is a saying that people who easily discover their own weaknesses tend to become bloodshot eyes looking for others' weaknesses. Is this how we can become people who approach others well? --- From "You have to be able to support yourself first to be considerate of others" The trust that others have in us is sometimes created 'naturally' in the process of work, but there is also an aspect that we have to design ourselves to some extent. It is good to be humble, but that is why we must be careful not to be condescending blindly. It is Napoleon's saying, "If there is no opportunity, ability is useless." That's right. First, we have to create an opportunity, and that opportunity comes from my brilliance that I express appropriately. Don't look shabby. People who make fun of themselves tend to be funny to others. It is not about seeing yourself as precious in order to suppress and rule others. It is about seeing yourself as precious in terms of self-care that helps you grow. Speaking in a way that makes you precious narrows the distance between you and others. --- From "If you are too humble, you will become a pushover" Habits that have been ingrained in your mouth for decades will not suddenly disappear. This is why you need to practice speaking. Even if the environment is tough, you should practice showing an active side rather than a defensive one. If necessary, it is okay to encourage yourself with positive self-talk like a kind of hypnosis. I once heard a professional golfer tell his secret like this. "When I move to the next place after missing a tee shot, I don't think, &