The holidays are a wonderful time, but for some parents and children, they become a real test of relationships. Little ones lose count of their “wants”, teenagers defend their own rights and freedoms, and adults try their best to exert authority. How can you become important to your child? Is it okay to punish them? How can you still maintain a trusting relationship? Is it worth crossing the fine line and becoming a “friend” for your child, with whom you can do anything? How can you establish contact if your child “doesn’t hear” you? We discussed these and many other questions with a psychologist, and also a mother of 7 (!!!) children, Larisa Surkova. 00:00:00 In this episode 00:00:56 How does Larisa Surkova combine raising 7 children with active practice, writing books, and blogging? 00:03:40 How did Larisa get 2.7 million subscribers on a banned network? 00:05:41 Larisa Surkova's Most Difficult Child 00:06:26 Are You an Authority for Your Child? 00:08:54 Two Laws of Child Psychology 00:09:55 Why Is a Parent's Authority Under Threat After Age 7? 00:11:00 Do We Want Our Children to Trust Us or Submit to Our Will? 00:12:04 How to Earn a Child's Trust? 00:14:04 Two Rules in Larisa Surkova's Family 00:15:14 Why Doesn't Larisa Hide Her Feelings from Her Children? 00:16:14 Why Do Children Start Growing Up Early? 00:19:08 Yulia on a Pornographic Picture Her Classmate Showed Her 00:19:40 By What Age Should Parents Have Time to Build a Trusting Relationship with Their Children? 00:20:07 How to explain to a child what is ok to do and what is not? 00:21:19 Why the word "no" doesn't work? 00:21:48 What to do if a child confessed to stealing to you? 00:22:27 Two ideal questions to ask a child when you don't know how to react to what happened 00:24:15 In what situation is it good to share examples from your childhood? 00:25:20 What behavior of yours will provoke a child to repeat the offense, but in such a way that you don't find out? 00:26:22 What should be the main punishment for a child? 00:27:36 Can children determine their own punishment? 00:28:19 Should children be punished? 00:29:39 What is the correct way to punish children? 00:31:20 How to punish teenagers? 00:33:17 What to do if your child has a mess in his room? 00:35:16 How did Julia agree with her son to make his bed? 00:36:50 The child comes home late - what to do? 00:40:00 What to do if you did not have time to establish a trusting relationship with your child before adolescence? 00:41:12 How much do parents communicate with their child when he is in school (in minutes)? 00:42:25 Gadgets. When to start and can you limit them? 00:44:25 How to understand that your child is addicted to gadgets and what to do? 00:47:40 Why is it important for a child to know that you are also learning something from him? 00:50:30 How to react to swearing? 00:51:00 Is it possible to become a "buddy" for your child - swear, drink, smoke and hang out together? 00:54:05 Is it possible to avoid teenage rebellion? 00:55:12 The first harbinger of the most difficult age 00:55:30 Difficult adolescence. What should parents do? 00:56:48 How to make your teenager hear you? 00:58:27 We don't notice how often we insult our children 01:00:10 Is it possible to hug adult children? Telegram: https://t.me/JuliaMenshovaJulia Instagram*: / juliavmenshova *Instagram is owned by the American company Meta, which was recognized as extremist, banned in the Russian Federation. **Meta is the parent company of Facebook, WhatsApp and Instagram. Recognized as extremist and banned in the Russian Federation #psychology #menshova #samamenshova