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A harmonious relationship is an attractive goal for most people - but for many it remains just an unattainable dream. Either because they cannot find the right partner, or because their partnership is unsatisfactory. However, the real cause of general unhappiness, worry, loneliness, sexual frustration and boredom is to be found in our own woundedness and neurosis rather than in the quality of the existing or desired partner. In the presentation, we will review some everyday sources of suffering, consider their possible psychological causes, and try to outline the guidelines for a healthy spiritual and relational balance.